Wednesday, January 6, 1999

Long distance relationships are hell. Not very original as thoughts go, but I’m certainly feeling that way right now.

Even though I’m not someone who celebrates Christmas or even New Year’s, it was very hard this year to go through those days knowing my slave was 1000+ miles away. My family was actually all together for what will probably be the last time for years to come. I really wished that moon could have been with me–meeting my family and then listening to me gripe about them afterward.

The hardest part was being someone who doesn’t celebrate these holidays, because it meant I was left with countless unoccupied hours and no slave to help me fill them. she was busy with her family, so we couldn’t talk on the phone and had very little time online together. Then, I went and got sick Christmas Day. So here I wa,s feeling miserable and tired, and the one person I wanted to take care of me was far, far away. I kept telling myself over and over that next year we’ll be spending this time together–without family because we probably won’t be able to afford to visit after relocating–but, somehow, it didn’t work. I wanted her sitting with me at my father’s, having Christmas dinner with my mother, bringing me soup and tea, reminding me to take my medicine and keeping me company, helping me “whip in the New Year”…

I guess I’m just the ultimate domme: “I want what I want when I want it” (to quote from “When Harry Met Sally”) and I’m not sure there’s anything harder than wanting your slave with you and knowing it will be over a month until you see her again and much longer until you can be together permanently. Unless it’s being a slave who misses her Mistress.


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